The Road Not Taken
“Two Roads diverged in a wood and I- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference” Robert Frost
I knew the road I should take- the formula spelled out for singers in the industry-the correct path. But I took the one less traveled.
No neatly labeled degrees, no perfect resumes from top institutions, no big name endorsements saying “Yes this is how it’s supposed to be done”. I stitched my life in the arts together from instinct, willpower, and a love that didn’t make sense on paper.
And yet now,17 years later, I’m here. Still creating. Still standing. Now leading. Now Shaping.
Can I be honest?
The outside noise used to be so loud and would get to me. The glances, the questions, the imagined conversations that I believed people were having behind closed doors and in message threads. Subtle comments wrapped in politeness. “So what exactly do you do?”, “ Have you thought about doing something more stable- your skills would be great for XYZ” ,“ You’ll never sing that rep”. And beneath it all: The feeling that I should be further, more polished, more proven. Why didn’t I follow the path? Now: I invite the noise in . I send out surveys asking people from artists to audience members to critique work that I have put out there for world to see. I take in all of the feedback and put it through a filter in my brain that looks at it as data points creating a full story. I’m human and sometimes my initial response is defensiveness (I’m working on this) but upon further introspection, I put on my director hat and categorize the data and focus on how I’m going to strategize and apply this newfound knowledge.
Over the years I can’t tell you how many days there were when fear crept in. The nights when tears were shed because I needed to do this and knew it was my calling but even if I knew it I couldn’t help but wonder:
Did I mess it all up by not playing by the rules? Saying no to an undergrad in vocal performance when I couldn’t afford to support myself and go to school. Not doing the competitions and YAPs. Prioritizing growing a family when I should have been focusing on my voice? Will anyone ever take me seriously because I don’t check the “right” boxes? Am I too tall, too old, too big, too _______?
In my darkest hours sitting alone holding a baby with tears streaming down my face, I would hear a whisper. This internal voice that told me to keep going, told me that I had the skills to carve out a place for myself. I reminded myself that the most meaningful art, relationships, and breakthroughs rarely come from people who followed a manual or did things because thats how it has always been done. They come from the ones who wandered, who risked being misunderstood, who chose authenticity over approval.
Don’t get me wrong, the traditional path works for some and is right for them on their journey and I completely respect it. It would have hallowed me out. It would have asked me to shrink, to please, to pretend to fit a mold made for someone else. It would have fed the extrinsically motivated and people pleasing part of me instead of letting life teach me the lesson that intrinsic motivation is my superpower.
So here I stand, with my dream job in my dream field and while I’m not exactly where I thought I’d be if you asked me five years ago, but somehow I’m exactly where I need to be. I want to share with you lessons I’ve learned, insights into the industry, in the hopes that my whispers combined with other voices of experience will create a chorus of kindred spirits that change the way we feel, think, and talk about life in this industry.
Stay tuned
-K
